have you?

Ever be in a situation where you don't know what shall you do to make things right?
Or to make sure you make the right decision, not to regret it later on?
Well, yes, experience is an euphemism of mistakes, and it enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. However, I believe this time, I am not quite sure if I am able to handle the pain. Again.

Call me a loser, I know. And how I know I'll get the advice of 'you are still young' or 'you have so many things ahead so don't worry blablabla' or 'your time is not here yet' yadayada. Believe me, I have tons of that I think it is enough to make me publish a good book on it. Failure, in everything you do, is a teacher, really, -a harsh one, but can be the best. When you make mistakes, you know you will learn from it. But you don't want to forever making mistakes, do you?

Rushing into one thing might be one big fat mistake that I've done few times and I am not going to make it again. On the far side of failure, you can see the success is waving at you, but I believe the sweet little success there also keep on shouting, "Don't rush, give yourself chances to work it out".

I don't think I am good at lying. I failed miserably few times and I don't want to do it again. So yes, I believe I have a problem with my heart. I choose terribly, I think poorly, I cant let myself be too happy as the phobia taught me to always be aware. You cant be too happy, can you? Oh now I sound stupid.

Since when I think it is hurt to be in love?

It is hard to understand a man, harder to understand a woman, hardest to understand yourself. Don't you think so too?