Went outside for a short walk. And I felt cold. Feelingless. I hate nobody but I also need no one. I tracked my life journey for these past few months and I saw black patches. Of nothingness. I decided to just walk and continue this pattern of nothingness and feelingless. For a while. At least for a moment. As those are the things that keep me smiling. To nothingness. Cheers.

Sent from my iPhone

Reason to cry

Listening to something that bring the tears

I found the reason to show. A side of me you didnt know.
The reason to start over new, and the reason is you.

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Why are you complaining?
Because no one understood.

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When the rain started to pour,
I forgot that I have no raincoat on.
So when I stutterred and showered,
The warmth that you brought
Means everything.

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The star in an orange
The moon in an apple.

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It is not a dream when it is no longer reachable. Too far.

Who do you think you are？

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Says one who cannot keep up

Well known News.
Yesterday was filled with dances and juices
So when the light is off,
The story continues,
It starts to bleed and hurting too.
Simple reason-
Hating the way it goes to.

A little bit over the moon.

"The important thing is to allow fate to intervene in our lives and to decide what is best for everyone."

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Loner

Loneliness gets stronger when we try to face it down, but gets weaker when we simply ignore it.

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No one lights a lamp in order to hide it behind the door:
The purpose of light is to create more light, to open people's eyes, to reveal the marvels around.

(paulo coello, 2008)

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Stagnant show

Either an action or reaction

Maybe an ebb or even one flow

Something is up for alters and changes

Giving trials, redo and amend errors.

Living in this pace of rhythm,
Some confidence needed to be shown
That without fear and clearer vision
One may stroll with fresh hope

Rather than living yet undecided
Stagnant with just no flow.

Bar the change, disturbance in cycles,

I said hello to people who knows.

Doses of medicine, with readings to be made,

I'll say I'm contented, at least for the day.

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The tide turned
Creeping slowly over the banks
Of sand. Of shingle.
Pools formed at the end
Of the breakwaters. Covered-
Patches of greens and blacks bore the taunting stories
Countless bubbles freed
From the sand
Trapping in the air.

Oh the moon! The moon.
A swathe of cloud
that came too soon
Blanking out the starlit sky.
Then the air grew colder
And smears of mist
Began to form
The painted skin
Glittering dew all over it.
New bribery.

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sleeping pill

Took one gulp of a drink
With hardly taken pills.
What is with all the thinking?
Big deal.
Turning onto the soft cottoncandy
When the turn directed by the nerdy
become a path
that nobody will lead.
So long baby,
have a good night sleep.

Hi-gh

An eye for an eye.
It shall be made for a try.
But i ended up cry.
For lest we forget.
Why we even start again.
The chirping sound.
Alive.
A birdie bird sharing soul.
Cracking heart.
Fly to the sky.
But everything.
Is not going.
To be fine.

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Karma

Came across something interesting, and I never think I will feel this. Oh, this is something new. A new level of stalking and being a stalker. No, maybe that is not stalking. That is just a coincidence. A big one. A funny one. One cheats, another is just the same. Hurting and being hurt, and stupid beyond words. I turned a blind eye, no, blind eyes. But the smile I get for myself is still the best one.

Thanks to the flower.

Is it wrong to not able to let go?

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Kuala Lumpur - Batu Pahat

One old lady
Sitting beside the girl
The girl smile sweetly
The old says hi and turn
She looks sad and sappy
The girl offer her a sweet
She smiles and there is a tear
Down running her cheek
The girl just touch her hand
As a gesture of concern
And let the old lady cries
But somehow deep in heart
Both feel relieved and loved
For they wont need to talk
Just with silent exchange of thought

Deep ones.

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That hardest subject

Love sure is not an easy subject to score in life. And not all will experience the same test. Some will get lucky and happy, but some will down with failure and cry to feel better. However that may be, there is no perfect score in love. Most of the time, you will be forgotten for what you did and your strength for they remembered your mistakes and your weaknesses. No, do not be sad. Held your head high and walk your way to save your pride, whatever there is left. It is not your fault when you think you are not good enough for the other person, but when that thought come across your mind, usually it works the other way around. It doesn't matter anymore. This subject might not be your specialty in life, thus you shall try another. Forget the pain. Forget the failure. One step at a time, believe that you can make your life better.

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Look at the star and how they shine for you..

It was all yellow..

It was all for me to swallow.

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To err is human.
To forgive, divine.

Forgive me,
If I have done something wrong.
Not to ignore me,
And leave it like nothing is wrong.

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Berpesan pada angin, sampaikan rasa hati.

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Looking at the sky and wonder, what will happen for the next coming years.

Because I am walking the path I should have avoided. For that is the only path I want to take right at this moment.

Oh heart oh my
Please bear this I know we all cry.
I made mistakes
I took advantage
I finally came to understand again
That the life is never fair.
Brokenhearted to pieces?
No.
To nothing.

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Hi moon! Said the star.
I am always looking at you. But you just dont know that. Maybe because you are big, maybe because you are pretty. But mind you, i will be missed.
Goodnight sweethearts

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Reading and reciting stories to
The wall.

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Sunset

At this sunset
I see the beauty of life
Eveb just for a while, it is there
And will come again
Those captured moments are the most precious ones
And will forever be in mind.

The moon
Doesn't it just happen to be
Above you
Before you know it.
It just rises up
Before you realize it.
It doesn't shine that brightly
That's why
You don't notice
When you lose sight of it
That might be the first time
You realize the existence
Of the moon

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Seeing you

All the bubblies
All the chatters
All the Stories
The dramas there
Make me feel like home again
Home of love
Home of care
Home of lots of things
Everywhere

'I'm going British nowadays'
Yeah right, nice.

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When the firefly is flying all by itself,
I see hope but a little one.
Beautiful.
But darkness all around and behind.

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Maybe we have to get a little messed up
Before we can step up.

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Lights in my heart

Slowly brightening the night
Slowly bringing the fight
To see the darkness in heart
The light
I change for the better for the worse
For the love of own life
I let myself learn
That life is simple.

Hello June

Store some of leftovers for the next feast! I shut and smile and left the faith behind. The rain in the desert. The sun that shine so bright. The future.
Babysteps.

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Maybe,
there is another route.
There is another truce.
Just maybe,
I can smile again.
Put the sorrowness into the drain.

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When my friend told me to ignore and move on, I question myself the ability to move forward. I doubt much, but believe for more to gain. Ive done crying. Ive done mourning. Heck, why should I even care at the first place, looking back at all the memories that I know will bring back all the tears. The msgs in the inbox and some random thoughts are not real. I know somehow I feel bad for myself actually for being like how I am today. But I learned. I want to be stronger. For whatever prides left on me, I want to move. Forward.

This hurtful feelings are not without tears but tears never help but to release my tense. Only.

My own sort of tranquility.

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I cried nonstop for over an hour without any specific reason. I am so tired now i feel like throwing up. What a bad day.

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Just a small button with the big turn
Jolly yiehaw and yayy no mourn
Brought the cake
Late you bake
A girl who late
But claim to take
Throphy to make
Yourself to fake
Now he is dead
And none to blame
But the pursuit of fame

No time wont wait
But please
Just stay
In life, I would say
And keep appearing
Breathing
Till death take it away

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Be the change you want to see in the world (Gandhi)

You want to see others the way you like. How about you be one first? See, Gandhi perfectly gave us the guidance, how genius.

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Happyyy

So happy so shining
The day it is
Even when the wheather
so dark so gloomy
Praise the love
That is in the air
Bring up the mood
showed that you care

Happiness is what we dare to bare.
Thank yousssssss

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I miss you.
I never want to miss you like this.
It hurts.

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It doesnt matter if you are no longer in someone's heart.
After all, it is the faith that you have in yourself is the most important thing.

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You can close your eyes
to the things you do not want to see
but you cannot close your heart
to things you do not want to feel.

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People lied because truth hurts.

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HTD!

Happy Teacher's Day!
To me as well!

S2e7 23.57

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Watching greys anatomy.
And why am I being emotional and hating him?
For all I know now, begging wont do.
He likes her, just not enough.

Ouch.
This series watching really get on my skins.

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My bestfriend told me that everything is going to be ok. She lied.

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What you dont know wont hurt you?
I think the worst feeling is not knowing at all.

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I'd do it again.
I'd choose you.
Everytime.

Because it matters to me.

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The more reason for me

To feel at ease.
The sunset.

Lembaran 1 2011

I cant take it.
I thought that I can.

I cried.
I am sorry for myself
As I am not strong enough yet.

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Someone left me a note
In my iPhone
160 days ago.

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Happy Mother's Day

Because only you who can cut the cake for me with so much love like no other.

I love you, Mama.

P/s: the chocolate rice cake.